How to Ask a Girl Out

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A picture of a man giving flowers to his lover on a winter daySo do YOU know how to ask a girl out? There is predominantly three things that you need to remember when asking a girl out. First of all, keep it casual and make it about BOTH of you and not just you. Secondly, convey the message to her that you are a busy man, whose presence is in high demand and whose time is precious! And thirdly, use future projections!

So first of all, what do I mean when I say “Keep it casual”? You basically want to ask her out in a way in which you do not appear needy. For example, instead of saying “I would like to see you again”, you should say “It would be nice to see you again.” Although these two sentences are pretty similar, replacing “I would like” with “It would be nice” communicates that you are not coming from a desperate state of mind, but you are coming from a place in which you are stating what you would LIKE to happen, but don’t NEED to happen. This will help to show that you are a person of value and not a person of NEED! I think that everybody would agree that a person of value is preferable over a person of need!

So how and why should you convey the message that you are a busy man? Instead of telling her that you are available for the WHOLE of next week, give her some specific times in which you are available. For example, tell her that you are available for both Tuesday and Wednesday evening of next week. It can also be helpful to not arrange a date for next Friday or Saturday. This is because if you are the kind of man that has EVERY Friday and Saturday free, you may appear to be a bit of a ‘Nigel no mates’. Women LOVE a man who is going in some direction and who does something of VALUE with his life. If you were to tell her that you are available WHENEVER she is available, you are sending her the message that you really are not a man who is going in a good direction or a man who does something of value with his life. Although you don’t have to appear to be a complete workaholic, it is important to appear at least some what “busy” and as someone of value because this signals that you have the potential to be both a good provider and a good protector. It is built into the GENES of women to be attracted to members of the opposite sex who are both good PROVIDERS and good PROTECTORS.

So what is meant by using future projections? Future projections are used by stating future events in order to paint a picture of what is going to happen. However, many guys get this wrong! A lot of guys will say things like, “I would LOVE to take you to this awesome new movie that is coming out next week.” This is the wrong way to use future projections because you are pressurizing the girl into doing something with you. As soon as you start pressurizing her, her natural response is to try and find a way out of it! You DO NOT want to make a girl feel as if she has an obligation to do something with you. Again, this will make you appear NEEDY and will not communicate to her that you are a person of value. What you should do instead, is use a line such as “I BET that you are the kind of girl that talks ALL OF THE TIME during a movie!” Use this line in a playful kind of way. When you use this line, you are showing her that you can be a bit cheeky and she will now WANT to QUALIFY herself to you. She may respond with, “No YOU are the kind of guy that talks during a movie!” You see, women LOVE a man that is willing to challenge them. Women are VERY attracted to guys that provide a bit of “spark” to a relationship and they LOVE the challenge of trying to “fix” a guy. A man who is not afraid to challenge a woman is a man who is of value. A man who tries too hard to IMPRESS a woman, is a NEEDY man and not a man who is very attractive to woman. Once you begin to be a bit cheeky and challenging when asking out a girl, she is likely to be no longer deciding whether or not she wants to go out with you, she is now deciding HOW she can “one up” and get the better of you. She now knows that you are a person who is both CONFIDENT and of VALUE. And she has now ACCEPTED this challenge.

So if there is ONE thing that I want you to take away from this advice, it is that you need to ask a girl out from the point of view of a person who is of VALUE as opposed to a person who is of NEED.

So this is how to ask a girl out!

Good luck and have fun! 😉